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Showing posts from December, 2017

2018

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As I reflect back on the year I've had, I feel lucky to have had a year full of success and growth. I started off last year puking my guts into a toilet bowl after drinking too much, but was surrounded by amazing friends on a small island in Belize--doing what I love: traveling. Then I had the best semester of collegiate golf in my career. I went on to help my team win a conference championship, in which I placed 3rd individually. Then I managed to keep my 4.0 GPA intact while finishing up my first year of graduate school. I then was given the opportunity to live and work in Maine which clearly changed my life and perspective on a lot of things. In August, I started my last year of graduate school and again managed to keep my 4.0 GPA. I am no longer playing golf but am the graduate assistant for the golf team (which means I get to coach and have my school paid for! Win-win). I managed to find a roommate who I get along with, and we both signed up for kickboxing (to attempt to get...

Why It's Time to Cut Toxic People Out Of Your Life

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Ever found yourself saying: "I'm too old for this shit?" Same goes for dealing with toxic people. I'm 22 and I find myself saying this on a regular basis. I have no place for drama in my life. Some people literally drag drama around with them wherever they go. I personally want no part of it. I'm at that age, where I'm trying to figure out my own shit. Why be bogged down by other people who are clearly bad influences on your life? I'll be starting a career soon, I'll be meeting new people, having new experiences. Yes, it's great to keep old friends and relish in your old memories but is it worth it if they're clearly a negative influence on your life? I'm not saying change your phone number, or address, or anything that drastic. But stop putting energy into people who don't give a shit about you or don't put in the same effort as you! You do not deserve that. Friendships (and relationships) aren't one sided. They only ...

Why It's Important to Travel Every Chance You Get

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I'm a firm believer that everyone should travel at some point in their life. When I say travel, it doesn't even have to be an epic trip. It could be, but it doesn't have to. There is so much to see in this world, you don't even have to go that far to stumble upon something new. I've been traveling for as long as I can remember. I took my first international trip when I was 13, and we went to Germany and did an epic road trip (sense a trend with the road trips?). My golden birthday happened when I was 13, so my big present was to ask my mom if I could tag along on her Germany trip. I have always been fascinated with WW2, and getting to go to Germany to see where it had all originated was an exciting endeavor. The first time I traveled outside the country (I'm not counting Mexico and Canada), it definitely was not the best experience at the time. As I grew up, I came to appreciate that trip for what it was. I think traveling is something you get better at ...

Why Every College Student Should Work at a Summer Camp

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Let me start by saying: I'm in love with this topic.  This past summer, I traveled to Poland, Maine to work at Tripp Lake Camp. It was hands down the best work experience I have ever had in my entire life (yes entire 22 year-old me). I learned more about myself in those 2 months than all of college combined. I also met some of the most incredible people of my existence there and found such a welcoming community it's hard to give it adequate justice through words. Ending up working at Tripp Lake Camp was a journey. It's amazing that life took me there, and I'm so thankful. Last winter, I was looking for a change in a summer job. I had worked at Pinetop Country Club for 3 years and was over it. I was also done with collegiate golf so I didn't need to practice 24/7 over the summer (I was free). Therefore, I was looking to work somewhere exciting. I had always wanted to be a camp counselor. Frankly, I had always wanted to be a camper! I mean, have you seen the ...

Random Thoughts

Sometimes (most of the time), I think that I like the idea of things. But, when I get it (or don't), I'm always left feeling like I actually didn't want it that much. It's fun thinking about how things could turn out, but once it's in front of me I tend to leave confused. I need to get better at making sure that it really is something I want or like, rather than something I'm just missing or want at the moment. **After reading this over again--it sounds like I'm talking about ice cream or froyo. How sad is my life though?

Untitled (Poem Circa 2009)

I sit here in silence, waiting.. for someone to speak. T he quietness of it all dries my lips, I can't breathe.  T he person next to me feels the same way, I can sense their discomfort I hear voices in my head, first a whisper then a scream I look around with alert in my expression but I can't see anyone my vision is blurred I can't think. I take a deep breath and listen again I hear names? responses? questions? why must this day always come? why me...

The View

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If I could just have this view everyday of my life, I'd be content. So many places to see...

Are You Strong Enough? (Poem Circa 2009)

While pushing forward to reach your goal you encounter a numbness that keeps you going so you feel no pain Y ou can almost see it but it's just out of reach shall you keep going? I guess we'll wait and see Are you strong enough? To continue the same race because it will never stop.  It's a battle from within, and if you stop, it's the end but if you dare to stay standing you'll eventually have to give in Are you ready to except defeat? you know you cant win there's no point why try when you know what your fate is ? But that's the thing, you cant give into those negative thoughts fate can always be changed no matter what now, ask yourself, are you really strong enough?

Iris-Goo Goo Dolls

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This continues to be my favorite song, even 7 years after it was released. This is all.

The Unknown (New Poem 12/23/17)

As I take my first step In the direction that I will come to find  Is north The thought dawns on me That the journey has just begun It is unclear  What I will learn On this adventure Somehow, it always seems to surprise me How I come back changed The setting is the same The people are the same  But I come back different I find myself going through the motions  But I know this is not where I belong; anymore. What was once comforting and nurturing Has become stifling I find it hard to fall back into a routine I find myself searching for purpose I’m searching for some type of clarity I’m not sure if I’m supposed to pursue it  Or if it is supposed to happen in time  I’m not sure how much longer I can wait  The walls are closing in  I feel my life slipping from my grasp.  I reach out, in the hopes I will  Somehow catch my purpose As if it is manifested in thin air And that I ...

Mizzling Sky (Poem Circa 2010)

I watch stars rotate in the sky, A dark clear atmosphere makes it easy to identify, I look into his deep brown eyes, Three words, I have memorized We will remember tonight, for the rest of our lives

Why Am I Hiking the PCT?

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Question of the hour: Why the PCT? What in the world would possess me to want to hike 2600 miles across 3 states??? Let me start by saying this has been on my bucket list for a long time. Yes, I have read Wild and yes I've seen the movie. Is that why I'm hiking? No . Did I think the book and movie adaption were inspiring? Yes. But that is not why I am hiking. The first reason I'm hiking is simple.... because I want to. Like I said before, it has been on my bucket list. As a perk, thru-hiking is bad-ass. Thru-hiking is challenging, not only physically but mentally. It gives you a lot of time to think. When I say a lot of time, the PCT will give me around 4 or 5 months of time to think. To think about what you may ask? Everything . I've always been a planner. I like to know what I will be doing, and exactly how I will accomplish that. Now you may think that this wouldn't be conducive to thru-hiking, but I have found that it really is. The amount of planni...

Lies (Poem Circa 2010)

For all the lies and through all the tears, I attempted to tread in open waters hoping to find the answer that I was so adamant to discover. I thought, achieving a goal set out against me since the beginning would make me feel, fulfilled and no longer empty inside. But, life had another plan, and e very success comes at a price No one is safe from the insatiable hunger of the future. And it probably didn't turn out as planned.

Forever and Always (Poem Circa 2010)

I catch your glance as I walk by secretly breathing in your sweet scent. Your eyes seem sad, yet at least there's some happiness, I cringe as another girl takes your hand. We talk on the phone all hours of the day, and when I see your smile I feel so alive Like life could never be better. I know it's cheesy, but you keep running through my mind, we both can feel the chemistry,  yet we must deny it. Our lives are so different now, And we've grown apart, yet our paths always seem to meet, whether by chance, or coincidence, I know not. And in those small moments, It's like nothing else matters, and the whole world seems to stop Like we're the only ones in it. Nothing could be more obvious yet I make no attempt to be with you, I hopelessly wait for the day you'll realize the truth That I have always loved you.

Judgmental

While I have known for the better part of my life, it has come to my attention this holiday season that my entire family thinks of me as judgmental. Me? Judgmental? Haha yeah sometimes. Sorry, I can't help it. I think I use it as a crutch. I do it without even meaning to. It's a shielding mechanism. I'm not good at letting people into my life. Even those that I have let into my life, I've left many friendships feeling betrayed and hurt. Okay so yeah I'm pretty judgmental. Do I get points if I admit that? I like to think of myself as a fairly intelligent person. When stupid things are sent my way, my only way to respond to them is negatively. It at least gives the person time to adjust their future approach. Maybe they don't even know that they're being stupid or are proposing an idiotic idea. I've taken it upon myself to let them know the truth. Obviously, many people don't appreciate my idea of the truth. Which is why I'm here writing this p...

Pacific Crest Trail

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On Sunday morning, my dad and I packed small bags containing water and a few snacks. We then proceeded to walk 22 miles on various trails on South Mountain (behind our house). You're probably asking yourself: WHY??? The answer: I'm training for the Pacific Crest Trail (PCT). It's a trail that runs from Campo, California to Manning Park, Canada. The entire trail is 2,659 miles long! I will be attempting to thru-hike the PCT. For reference: thru-hiking means, "hiking a long-distance trail end-to-end within one hiking season" (thanks google). So basically, I have been preparing to hike 2,659 miles. A little crazy, right? Well, I'm doing it! I will be leaving the southern terminus around the middle of May and I'm hoping to finish sometime in September! I anticipate being on the trail for around 4 months or a little bit more! I will be doing additional posts on this topic, like what gear I'm bringing, and what my resupply strategies are in the future!...

First Blog Post!!

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Hey Guys, So I thought I'd start a blog. This is mainly to keep people updated on my life, without trying to spam Facebook or other social media platforms. I've been wanting to start a blog, but I just haven't gotten around to it until now... at 1:00am on a Thursday morning! So here we go. So these past few years (post-high school) have literally been so great. This May will be the official five year mark! How flipping crazy is that?? Like, I feel like I was just in high school...Wasn't really the biggest fan of high school, but can many people even say that? Thankfully, I have met some of the most amazing people from all my adventures since graduating! It's crazy that I know people from all over the world! Now if only I had a ton of money to visit everyone! This upcoming May, I will be finishing up my master's degree in Criminology with a concentration in human behavior! I'm so ready to graduate. I definitely need a break from academics! But I'll...